I REMEMBER an old song which you only seem to hear these days on albums. I Didn't Know What Time It Was. The guy had been knocked sideways by a chick he'd just met, as far as I can recall. Well, sometimes I find myself wondering not only what time it is but what day it is and even what year it is!
     Like now.
     Because now I've just finished a spectacular and people ask me when they're going to see it and I have to tell them - next Christmas!
     (In England, at any rate. I don't know about you.)
     In fact, when they heard in England I was going to New York to play the part of Pinnochio (an actor yet!) in the TV show of that name, it was back at the end of '67.
     And when they asked me when they were going to see it I had to tell them - next Christmas, NEXT YEAR! ! !
     It's a 90-minute show and it took a month to make. All through February. Working in New York. One of the nicest jobs I've ever done. Because it meant that, for a whole month, I was able to stay in one place. And if you're going to do that - well, New York is as good a place as any.
     Cold? Well, yes. Except in the studio under those lights. And when I came out, people used to say: "Why, you've got quite a tan!"
     The fact is, of course, it was the remnants of the tan we got when we all went down to Miami for a few days over Christmas before coming back up the coast to do the Jackie Gleason Show, and then go on to do a few spots promoting the new single.
     Which is another story.
     Because just before that came out, one of the boys got married. Barry Whitwam, our drummer.
     It was supposed to be very hush-hush, but the papers got wind of it, and then the

telvision boys, and Barry didn't quite know what had hit him!
     Cameramen outside his home. Reporters ringing up his home all hours of the night. Police alerted to keep back the crowds. I remember him saying (plaintively is the word):
     "All I'm doing is getting married!"
     But there it was. Get married they did. And he and Dale (that's her name) are living happily ever after as per the story books.
     Let me introduce you to Dale while Barry isn't looking. She and Barry have known each other for years. Four to be precise. And she doesn't like pop! Or rather, she's very choosy. But in spite of that, here they are, man and wife! And they had their honeymoon with us down in Miami.
     (One other thing about Dale that possibly made her even more attractive to Barry: she's in the nursing profession. Just the thing for a touring musician. Because, boy, as much as we love them, we sure feel the need of medical attention after some of our tours!)
     What was I saying? Oh yes! Just after the wedding, our single came out. The title? Not very appopriate, perhaps.
     I Can Take Or Leave Your Loving!
     (Luckily Dale's broadminded.)
     But back to that Time confusion. Just before we left New York on New-Year's_Day-plus-One (getting worse, isn't it?) we'd done some promotion spots for another TV spectacular. And people said: "When are we going to see it?" And I had to say: "In about a week's time."
     And then they'd say: "What's it all about?" And I'd say: "It's all about us at the Ohio State Fair." And they'd say: "When was that?" And I'd say: "Last September." And they'd say. . .
     As I said, I remember an old song where the guy didn't know what time it was.
     He was lucky.
     Sometimes I hardly know what year it is!