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AMERICAN GROUPS: I know quite a lot about them, because I had a week off in Los Angeles recently and I went to see all the different groups, like the Grass Roots, Byrds, and all these geezers. They all have weird names. There's one fantastic group called the Buffalo Springfield who are going to be really big. It's all freak-out music - colours rather than music. It's all a big moody. They don't entertain, they just stand there, which all the hippies dig in Los Angeles. At the Whiskey-A-Gogo they show psychedelic films while the acts are playing and the crowd watch the screen instead of the group. BOREDOM: I can't get bored. I often prefer to be on my own, but I never get bored for more than a minute. I can always think of something to do - even if it's only thinking. MONEY: I used to think money was everything and all I wanted to do from the age of 15 until now was to make a lot of money. But it's not what I'm really after, not even the things you can buy with money. Mind you, I've been broke and I've had money so I know which I prefer. I'd rather have too many sandwiches than starve. TOP BILLINGS: The only person who should top a bill is the person who can entertain more than the other 14 acts on the bill. Somebody with something extra. It's very hard to top a bill now because you get very mixed audiences in England, young and old, and you've got to appeal to both. But this recent row about billings is the most unprofessional thing I have ever heard. It's like a famous American group who walk out on a show because they can't agree on what colour tie to wear. The only show Herman's Hermits missed was when I had food poisoning. But I like the Small Faces. They are great blokes. Print that because they'll think I'm getting at them. MILK: it's got hidden drug meanings. "No Milk Today" is a drug song, and can you find the hidden drug meaning in "Somewhere Over The Rainbow"? And what really goes on in Yogi Bear's cave? HOLLIES: A knockout! I saw them in New York. Graham Nash and Cass Elliott are mates, and they are writing songs together. I remember a long time ago the Hollies told me I shouldn't sing Beatles numbers. I thought they were being big-time, and I didn't realise they were trying to be helpful. FRUIT MACHINES: I'm not really mad on them. I prefer the ones you flip a ball around. I think I'll buy one. Americans rush up to a fruit machine when they're over here because they are illegal in most places in the States. They think it's a big deal, like gambling, and when they win four tanners they run about screaming "Freak out!" TEETH: I'm going to look after mine. I've got an auntie with false teeth and she can't eat chocolates. She has to run into the bog and pull her teeth out if she does. My teeth are |
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great. American dentists really give you a great snow job, they really make you feel great. You sit in a big chair and hear piped music, and all the drills are soft. Over here it's all screaming and agony, and the dentists think you're only good for a few bob anyway, and the drills make a horrible noise. The best dentist is in Detroit - he's the king of the snow men. I've got a problem with my teeth - too many. I was going to wear a brace but I pushed them straight with my tongue. Before that they used to grow in fifteen different directions. DOORMEN: I used to have a big hate for them until I put myself in their place. It's like working behind the bar at 11 p.m. when all the drunks are complaining about an inch off the top of their beer. You get cheesed off and all you can think about is "What a rotten job I've got." HORROR FILMS: I've seen 'em all. I liked the one with the fright break - "beep beep" - and you're not supposed to look, and nothing happens anyway. In every horror film a bird screams. The only horrors are the actors. STRIKES: I read that in Russia you can't strike because everybody works for themselves, so if you strike, you're striking against yourself. PAUL JONES: I hope he's big. I really do, because he's the sort of person who can cope with it all. The only thing that puts me off, is when you're at a TV canteen and the woman comes up with an autograph book. You sign next to Paul Jones and you see he always puts a CND next to his name. I don't think you should mix the two scenes. I know a lot of kids in CND who are good lads, and it's a great thing going out painting on bridges. I love people who believe in things, but putting it on autographs is like me signing: "Herman - The World Will Die By Fire: Matthew Chapter III, verse 27." But I like Paul. I saw him sing on the Small Faces farce and he's a great rock and roller. I met Paul three years ago and he came over and said: "Are you Herman? I liked your last number." And it was like a big deal because I was only 15 years old then. POP TOURS: I love doing tours, except for the coach thing. It's great sitting around the theatre manager's office after the show chatting. They're all great guys, wearing evening dress with gravy marks, and smoking packets of ten. RUDENESS: I don't think you see a lot of it. Most people get too embarrassed to be rude. It's much easier to be nice. The only really rude people sit in First Class Non-Smokers on the train and say: "I say, this is First Class y'know!" They're hoping you'll be rude back. LONDON: I used to hate London so much. But now I realise it's the greatest. I'm trying to buy a flat in town. At the moment I just stay in hotels or with friends. I really need a flat I can soundproof and play records as loud as I want, so I don't get complaints from the old man upstairs with a heart attack. |